LAWLZ!!

Hello!!!!
I'm on the computer in the choir room!!
Go me!
It's 8:07 pm according to Lauren!!
We're at the musical right now!
Danielle is here and she told me to tell you that she's being annoying!!
So.....I'm just posting something really random to get the depressing stuff off my front page....
So...YEAH!!
CAST PARTY TONIGHT!!
WHOO!!!
Luv ya guys!
I'm starting to get over tired!!
BEWARE!!
GRAWR!!!
=3
lalalalala!!
I'm so freakin weird!!
im just typing random things right now except i cant really type right now!!
ok well im gonna go now so....
smooches!!
hugs!!!
luv ya guys!!
~A.Q.

All at Once...

What i did to Rudy one boring summer day....MOHAWK!!

XD

I figured that this would be the easiest way to tell everyone the news instead of having to repeat it over and over and over again.

I don't know how well i would have been able to do that....

Now before i tell you the news i want to ask you not to act any different when you see me next it won't help. No calls no nothing....

I deal with this kind of stuff by escaping and you guys are the ones that help me with that.

You keep me happy and laughing (usually... ;P). So thanks.

Anyways what i came here to say was....

Uggh! This is so damn hard!!!

I feel like saying it makes it real.

Well....I've gotta tell so here i go...

My dog, Rudy, is dead.

Yeah.....i already had the premonition that was going to happen like i said in my last post but i can't believe that it actually did

I mean, I still cant-don't want to believe it!

He was my dog since i was 4 and has been my buddy since then

I mean he was annoying at times...and smelled...a lot

but he was my buddy

this is the second dog that has died this school year i don't think i can handle another pet dying this year.

Well anyways Rudy didn't die he was put to sleep

He was suffering too much he only weighed 58 lbs. when he used to weigh a little more than me, 140 lbs.

He had masses in his stomach which is a cancerous type of thing and his intestines were blocked and some organ that started with a 'G' was inflamed, He was basically dying from the inside out.

The surgery costs 2000 and up and he might have been even worse off after it anyways.

So mom had to make the horrible decision of putting him to sleep.

I feel so bad for my mom though.

She needs the most support. My sister didn't help with the matter at all.

She was beyond the point of sobbing and was totally broken down.

She was pretty much blaming my mom and kept on asking why we couldn't basically go into debt to pay for the surgery that wasn't even going to make him better for sure.

When she finally left my mom just said,

"She's going to blame me forever."

It hurt me to hear my mom say that...to see that she was suffering so much.

i really wanted to beat some sense into my sister right then but then i also wanted to comfort mom. I chose the latter and hugged my mom for a long time.

*sigh*

Anyways....

He 'died' tuesday morning at 7:30.

And I've been doing okay since then but today i really don't feel good.

I have not been healthy lately.

I cant wait until rehearsal ends so i can get my life and health back. I've been feeling like I'm gonna pass out any second lately.

Don't get me wrong

I love rehearsal i really do

i just don't like what its doing to me...

So remember

Tomorrow-this basically never happened

So no hugs no calls no sniffles

just smiles and jokes and normality

well.....as normal as we can get

;)

Love ya guys!!!!

luv,

A.Q.

Long Time No See!!

Hiya!!

I know....

i haven't posted in forever but I'm posting now so don't kill me!!

><

Anyways.

I've been so tired lately and i dont know why.

I just cant seem to get enough rest.

I just hope i dont get sick from all this.

My head hurts a lot and my grades aren't doing too well from the lack of sleep either.

I got the proud grade of 67% in Math and my science grade went down...again. I didn't too well on an easy french test and i cant focus,think,speak clearly anymore.

I just.....ugh!

And I feel like I need a good cry because I'm missing the last two of my manga classes on Saturday. And I love it so much and i wont be able to say goodbye to them and give them hugs and it just sucks because i always loved going and it was something new and different and it helped with my drawings and encouraged my creativity and it was just a really fun realxing place to be and get away from everything.

*sigh*

On top of all that I'm not sure how much longer my dog is going to live.

He's lost too much weight too fast and he hasn't eaten anything and even when he drinks water it just comes right back up.

He's just not doing well....and I'm not sure whats going to happen.

And you know what really sucks?

I hate being down.

I dont like crying!

I want to laugh and have fun!

I want to be happy, i like being happy!!

And I'm finding that it's getting harder to lose myself in everyone and thing around me and enjoy the moment...which is what i used to do so easily before.

I dont want to become depressed again.

urgh!

There's too much drama and highschool!!

><

Ah well....

So....

hope you guys have been doing well!

Can't wait until the play huh?

:)

I'm listening to one of my favorite songs!

It's Once Upon a December from Anastasia

Ever heard it???

It's really good!

I love the movie too.

Well....

Some of us have to be to school bright and early tomorrow (><) (from 9am to 3 pm!!)

oh and go watch the video at the bottom

I love the song! and the singer is pretty cute too!!

;)

tee hee!

;)

A.Q.

the professional moodswinger